Saturday, January 2, 2016

Week 28: What Do You Want?

Just BARELY squeezed this in before the week was up!

 Week 28 of the 30 Week Writing Challenge

Original Topic: What do you want?

Since I already addressed my life dreams here

I decided to take a different approach. 

I got my first iPhone in 2008 
and I must've made this list around that time. 
I never delete it because it always makes me chuckle a little. 

New Topic: What do you* NOT want?
*according to 23-year-old Emily


 1. Fat. 
When I wrote this list I was around a size 4-6, 
so I'm not sure if I thought "fat" was a size 10 or size 20. 

Which I THINK my shallow 23-year-old self meant, 
was to be someone who just gives up on their appearance.

2. Unstylish. 
Um, did I ever REALLY think I was stylish? 
I mean, C'MON, 23-year-old Emily!
Again, what I THINK I meant was someone who doesn't care about their clothes. 
Someone who puts thought into an outfit, 
rather than ignoring all mirrors in their house. 

3. Chunky shoes. 
Well then. 
That's a pretty specific one. 
Was there a surge in chunky shoes in the late 2000s? 
Or did I just mean I wanted to keep my feet firmly planted in pumps? 

4. Always talking bout household duties? 
(Also, was it too much effort to add the "a" for "about"?) 
I assume this is reference to my mother 
and the annoyance I felt listening to her talk about keeping a house. 
First of all, I've tackled half this problem with having a cleaning lady 
(cue hallelujah chorus) 
and secondly, if "raising a child" is a household duty, 
then I've failed miserably here. 

5. Complaining about how expensive things are. 
Again, probably another reference to my mother. 
I'm sure there was a specific incident that caused me to type this, 
but who the hell knows what that is. 
In general, I don't think it's appropriate to rave about the cost of things. 
Unless of course, you're raving about $5 face cream
and then it's more the amazement of the deal. 
At this point in my life, 
I know a fairly wide variety of people in many different financial situations. 
I know people who buy the store-brand brownie mix because Ghirardelli costs $0.60 more. 
I also know people who regularly spend $300 on 2 oz of face cream. 
It's all different, 
which is why I think it's awkward if someone goes on and on about cost.  
6. Obsessed with my pet. 
Well, I don't have a pet, so that's easy. 
Take out pet and insert child, 
and I've failed miserably.

7. Talk about medical problems. 
Ok, this one I still get. 
I still avoid the aunt who just wants to talk about her hand therapy, 
and anytime someone brings up a medication list, 
I'm desperately searching for an escape route. 
But I'm also not experiencing many medical problems, 
so I reserve the right to change my mind in 45 years. 

8. Wear baggy t-shirts to bed. 
I assume this signified a decline in passionate relationships. 
Good news is that I find baggy t-shirts too warm for sleeping, 
and still wear tank tops. 
But whatever. 

9. Wear significant other's clothes than to bed.
Excellent grammatical sentence here!
Did I mean it was ok to wear to bed, but nowhere else? 
And who is wearing all their spouse's clothing? 
I admit I wore Adam's boxers in my 9th month of pregnancy. 
But other than that... ?


  1. Oh, to be 23 again and know everything... pretty funny!

  2. First of all, thanks to lower back pain (violating rule #7 here) I'm getting a chance to be low-key and catch up on all my blog reading. Second of all, this list is hilarious! Way to go!