Books I Read (Nov-Dec)

Of Mess and Moxie 

by Jen Hatmaker 

Two things I didn't realize about this book: 

1) The author is a well-renowned Christian author/pastor 

2) It's nonfiction. 

If I had known either of these things, 

I would have NEVER read it. 

But, as it is,

 I opened it up 

and am glad I did. 

This author is wildly funny. 

And some of her chapters had me downright LOL-ing. 

That said, she also threw in some Christian cliches 

(I barfed a little reading "Jesus fangirl"). 

So I'll leave it up to you. 

Simon vs the Homo Sapiens Agenda 

by Becky Albertall

This was an enjoyable fast read. 

It's all about a gay kid coming out in highschool. 
It has had positive reviews from everyone, 
so definitely add it to your list!

Better than New 
By Nicole Curtis 

I'm not into Fixer Upper 
(nor their new line at Target, 
and yes you can throw tomatoes at me)
but I LOVE LOVE LOVE me some Rehab Addict. 
I am fiercely against the open-concept trend
and old houses are all "box" rooms, 
so it's my dream show to watch. 

As for the actual memoir, 
it's definitely interesting only if you are an avid Rehab Addict fan. 
Many of the chapters are talking about her homes, 
which only make sense if you can visualize the TV show. 

Truthfully, the most interesting part of all? 
She was a HOT F**KING MESS prior to her show taking off, 
and even now has shockingly terrible tastes in men 
(she totally owns up to this fact, too). 

Goodbye, Vitamin 

By Rachel Khong 

This easy read was strangely addictive...

...yet at the same time very depressing and kind of boring...

...yet addictive as in, 

I must find out more! 

So make of that what you will. 

The Alice Network 

By Kate Quinn 

A captivating book that sucked me in the second I sat down to read it. 

So much that I confess to whisking Oliver out of his crib 
and settling him into a Daniel tiger 
(normally we spend Post-nap reading a dozen books or so) 
just so I could finish this up. 

Great read. 

The jumping past-to-present didn’t bother me at all. 

I liked the incorporation of WWI into WWII 
because normally you only hear of one or the other. 

How to Murder Your Life 
by Cat Marnell 

This book. 
I'm not even sure how to explain how I feel. 

I love love LOVE her writing. 
I love her descriptions. 
I love her wit and humor. 
I absolutely loved picking this book up. 

On the other hand, 
this book is a HARD read. 
The life and struggles of a drug addict. 
It is raw, 
brutal, 
frustrating, 
sad, 
and there was one page where I flat out wanted to puke. 

It is not an easy read, 
but I loved every second reading it. 
Does that make sense? 

7QT Dec 15th

1. Let's kick this 7QT off with a good laugh. 

Moms I'd Like to Punch : Christmas Card Edition. 

I was always the "newsletter" type, 

and this is the first year I'm not putting 
a family blurb on the back of our card 

(baby steps...).

Which brings us perfectly to... 


2. Our holiday cards! 

This is my favorite card in the past 3 years. 
I've been searching for a good family photographer, 
and I feel like I've finally found one. 

But never you fret, 
we aren't going to start themed baby photo-ops just yet. 
This blog will always remain true to crappy iPhone photos! 


3. Still on the holiday card theme, 
I borrowed a page from some blogger somewhere (forget who) 
and started taping our cards to the cupboards. 
I would never do this with nice and/or new cupboards, 
but since these cupboards are from 1966 
and hopefully will see the inside of the dumpster in a few years, 
I have no problem slapping scotch tape all over them. 

AND I LOVE IT. 
It brings me so much sappy holiday joy 
to be in my kitchen with these cards. 

forgive the horrendous florescent light.
It hurts my eyes just looking at this photo


4. So... Taylor Swift. 
Remember my first 7QT where I was all: 
"I don't like this new vibe;
 it doesn't fit her" 
?
Welp, turns out I love this new album. 
I still maintain I don't like the chorus of "What You Made Me Do," 
but all the rest of her songs? 
Yup, I'm a sucker. 

I may not obsesses over pumpkin spice, 
fall, leggings, or Uggs, 
but when it comes to Taylor Swift... 
I guess I am a basic white bitch. 
Dammit. 

5. TIME magazine came out with this year's best inventions. 

Some of them made me laugh, 
 (e.g.: Halo Top's "healthy" ice cream). 
Some were overdue. 
(e.g.: safer football helmets)

Some were inspiring. 
(e.g.: Nike made a hijab for Muslim athletes) 
Some brought tears to my eyes. 
(e.g.: a cost effective baby temperature monitors 
for locations too poor to afford incubator)
And some were like YES YES YES 
(e.g.: a quiet, portable, wearable breast pump!) 

6. Do you have 45 minutes alone to kill? 
Think waiting at the doctor's office? 
Or riding the train home? 
Or... just looking for some good ol' bathroom reading? 
I highly suggest reading this 
very lonnnnnnggg article on paranoid parenting. 

It is so spot on! 

7. And finally, rounding this out with 
my FAVORITE holiday publication. 
I look forward to this every holiday season, 
and this year did not disappoint. 
(Pineapple toothpicks for $50...)

I love my some Williams Sonoma, 
but even more I love me the 
"The Hater's Guide to the Wiliams Sonoma Catalog" 
written by Adam's favorite author. 
This is gold. 

Chill Day

I say that I'm a 

"Stay-at-Home-Mom who is never home." 

We are always out and about. 

Anything from visiting places (zoos, play scapes, etc) 

to outdoor play (hiking, playgrounds, etc) 

to basic shopping (Wegmans, Target, etc). 

We almost never have a full weekday at home. 

Or at least, not unless someone is deathly sick. 

To tell you the truth, 

I'm terrified of actually being home all day. 

Being home for a few hours gives me cabin fever. 

I am a person who needs the outside world. 

I go stir crazy long before my kids have lost it. 

Which is why last Friday was such an anomaly. 

We had grand plans to go for a very chilly hike in the morning 

(think: temps in the high 30s)

But I was just so damn tired. 

Adam has been working death hours in Big Law Firm World 

(think: 16+ hours days, arriving home at 1:30am) 

and I don't sleep well when he's not home. 

So when Aaron crawled into our bed at 6:30am, 

I asked: "Do you want to go hiking or stay home?" 

Him: "Stay home so I can wear sweatpants all day." 

(We have a rule that sweatpants are only for home. 

Otherwise, its jeans or khakis. 

I know, I'm a mean mom. 

I also know I'll lose this battle with Oliver.) 

We had a lazy morning breakfast, 

followed by some basement play, 

before I piped up with: 

"How about we watch Moana?" 

We don't watch a lot of full-length movies, 

so this was a big moment for the boys. 

We snuggled into the couch and watched Moana 

and. it. was. awseome. 

After Moana, I glanced at the clock 

and realized with a bit of horror that we had 1.5 hours till lunch. 

But some quick thinking solved that: 

We decorated gingerbread houses! 

Ok, not really gingerbread, 

but rather graham cracker houses. 

I had never decorated gingerbread houses as a kid 

(or at least we didn't do it with any sort of regularity) 

but it is something I want to instill as a memorable tradition in my family. 

Problem is, I hate gingerbread. 

I hear making it yourself is a nightmare. 

And I hear loads of complaints about those kits from Target. 

Pinterest to the rescue! 

I followed this site here 

and, for once in my life, it went smoothly. 

The Honey Maid crackers sawed well with a serated knife. 

The icing was PERFECT as a "glue" 

and Aaron absolutely loved it. 

Assembling and "gluing" the houses 

He got three houses and I got one (of course)

I texted Adam a few pictures 

and he was like: 

"Um, where is Oliver?" 

Me: "I don't know???" 

JK. 

I had brought up a box of "new" toys from our Toy Rotation hiding spit, 

so he was in all his glory rediscovering "long lost toys." 

Proof he had fun: 

Following that, 

we had leftovers lunch 

(of Ina Garten's Weeknight Bolognese which is Adam's new favorite 

and the boys both devour it, despite it being pretty spicy). 

At this point, I realized Oliver was covered in bolognese sauce, 

while Aaron was totally CAKED in hardened royal icing from the decorating. 

So mid-day bath it was. 

Following bath was nap, 

where I indulged in my very favorite productive holiday activity: 

present wrapping. 

It is so oddly satisfying to turn my tub of gifts 

into beautifully packaged boxes under our tree, 

waiting to be delivered at the next Christmas/Hanukkah party. 

After nap, we took it slow in the basement again, 

then the boys watched Thomas 

while I made another favorite Gruyere Bacon Mac & Cheese 

(it was a heavy pasta day for us). 

Dinner complete, I realized we again had time to kill before bed. 

An hour and 15 minutes to be precise. 

So we loaded up the car 

and drove through Philly rush hour traffic 

to get to Candy Cane Lane. 

It's this tiny little neighborhood lined with lit-up candy canes. 

It is the cutest and one of Aaron's favorites memories from last year. 

I'm incapable of figuring out how to post videos on here, 

but I posted two videos on my IG (LittleLoomis).  

I usually don't do recap posts on my blog. 

But this day in particular was especially sweet. 

A little reminder to myself that sometimes 

being a stay-at-home-mom 

(not an out-and-about-mom) 

can be fun too. 

Donations

Donations. 

And no, I don't mean that giant pile of house crap 

that gets picked up from my doorstep every few months. 

(Thank you, Greendrop!)

By donations, I mean monetary donations. 

Do you donate to charity or a cause? 

What charities? 

What causes?

Growing up in a very religious household, 

my parents taught the 10% rule, 

whereby 10% is "given back to God." 

I understood this as meaning a church, 

and so as a child, 

I dutifully set aside10% of my allowance 

and donated it to whatever church we were attending at that time. 

But as I grew older 

and became more and more disenchanted with the modern church, 

I stopped setting aside any money, 

because there was no one to give it to. 

Randomly, the first time I started thinking about donations again

 was the book "It Ends With Us" (reviewed here). 

While not a central part of the book, 

the main character values giving to charity,  

and regularly uses it as a question to gauge a person's character. 

As in: "Do you give to charity?" 

Rather like a light bulb going off in my head, 

it occurred to me that there are in fact, 

many many many charities out there that I would like to support. 

I may feel passionately about a cause, 

but it is important to take the additional step forward to do something. 

And to share, 

here are the charities / causes we have donated to this year. 

Some a little, 

some a lot. 

Some are big organizations
 or political groups, 

and some are teeny tiny charities put together by a couple. 


This isn't meant to toot my own horn, 
but rather to record (for myself, outside of Quicken) who/what I valued. 
Plus if anyone finds one of these inspiring, 
I hope you will donate even a little too! 

(In alphabetical order)

BVI Immediate Relief: 

I have followed the Windtraveler blog for years, 

and "watched" Hurricane Irma 

decimate the British Virgin Islands through their facebook feed. 

This couple have worked tirelessly 

to get the things needed for the BVI's to recoup, 

from chainsaws to tarps. 

Basic level supplies that are needed to kick start progress. 

Cannonball Kids Cancer: 

This charity raises money for kids cancer research. 

I blindly assumed that kids cancer was well funded. 

After all, you see commercials for St Jude all the time! 

But after reading this article by The Mom Edit, 

I was aghast both at the terrible treatment for kids cancers 

(many children die from the treatment, rather the cancer itself) 

and the sorry lack of funding for research options. 

Clean Water Action.  

Won't lie, I give to this charity out of 
sheer anger for Trump's anti-environment policies. 

Clean Water Action doesn't just focus on drinking water, 

they also focus on climate change, pollution, and trash cleanup. 

AND they also pursue legal litigation to combat new policies. 

In a time where I get red-faced angry any time the government is proposing new legislation, 

this is a teeny tiny middle finger move. 

Local Library: 

We love our library so much. 

We visit it at least once a week to play in the kids area, 

and usually every other week for story time. 

We have checked out hundreds of adult books, 

kids books, and DVDs. 

Yes, this is funded by the government, 

but with as much we use it and love it, 

I wanted to give a little more too. 

Moms Demand Action: 

This grassroots organization focuses on "gun sense" policies. 

No, they don't want to take away everyone's gun. 

They want background checks on all gun sales. 

They push for gun reform for domestic abuse 

(I had no idea how many domestic partners are shot to death). 

Did you know Ohio passed a law to allow guns in daycares? 

WHY WHY WHY. 

They worked with thousands of daycares to forbid guns on premise. 

They also educate parents about asking: 

"Hey my kid is coming over to play.  

Do you have guns in the house?  

If so, how are they stored?" 

I still get squeamish about asking this, 

but I figure that if someone is offended by that question, 

or doesn't want to answer how they store their guns, 

then that's probably not the right house for my child to play in! 

Preemptive Love: 

This relief organization focuses on "the forgotten communities" 

and is willing to go where no one else will go. 

They focus on Iraq, Syria, and the US. 

Do you remember the terrible siege at Aleppo by ISIS? 

They were in the thick of it. 

Schuylkill Center for Environmental Education:

Nestled within Philadelphia city limits, 

this nature center is chalk full of woods and streams 

and all sorts of beautiful trails to hike. 

I take the kids hiking there and, 

granted a 1-mile loop takes us 1.5 hours, 

but it is absolutely wonderful. 

They have a wildlife clinic where my friend brought sick, abandoned baby rabbits. 

And land restoration programs to bring back native plant diversity. 

I love places that work to save our environment. 

And the fact that this is within the Philadelphia city limits is very impressive. 
(Also, again, some prompting for this brought on by Trump's agenda)

Smith Playhouse & Playground: 

If you follow me on IG, 

you will see many many stories of the basement here, 

the "dungeon" which is setup as a traffic area, 

complete with working traffic light, 

for kids to buzz around on all sorts of scooters. 

That's Aaron's favorite part. 

Oliver's favorite part is the MASSIVE outdoor playground outside. 

And my favorite part is the architecture of this gorgeous old mansion, 

turned into room after room of toys for kids. 

It's 100% free 

and located in the "not so nice" area of Philadelphia, 

which means it is a beautiful blend of cultures, 
kids playing side-by-side.

Z = Anyone: 

Ok, not really, anyone

but generally if someone is signing up for a race, 

or a walk, 

or a bike charity, 

or a mission trip

I will try to give something. 

I respect people who are willing to do something to raise money. 

Granted, as a runner I understand the concept of: 

"well I'm running this race anyway, 
might as well raise some money" 

which is totally fair too. 

On a similar note, if there's a tragedy that strikes close to a friend, 
or a blogger that I follow (see above: the BVI), 
I believe it's important to contribute. 
If I'm sending "thoughts and prayers," 
then I should be sending some money too. 
e.g.: Just this week, friends of Jenna Wilber 
(someone I follow on IG whose child gave me the idea for the name Oliver)
 had their house burned to the ground in CA from the wildfires. 
I figure if we can spend $20/week on Adam's Starbucks habits, 
we can contribute $20 to someone else's recovery. 

Play vs Academic Based Preschools

I have embarked on my quest to find a preschool for Oliver next year, 

starting in September 2018, 

which is almost nine months away. 

However, preschools fill up quickly around here 

and I'm beginning to feel like we live in Manhattan, 

where I should have started my preschool application 

as soon as the two lines appears on the stick. 

Why not send Oliver to Aaron's preschool? 
Well, I say that Aaron goes to a local "preschool," 

he really goes to a part-time daycare. 

He was used to the daycare setting from when I was a Working Mom, 

and when I became a SAHM, 

I simply scaled him back to part-time schedule (8-12:30, MWF). 

For Oliver, though, I'm looking for a more tailored preschool. 

A preschool that is, in fact, an actual preschool, 

versus a part-time daycare. 

So herein lies this new conundrum: 

Play-Based vs Academic-Based Preschools

I won't attempt my butchery job of describing the two, 

so instead I am copying/pasting directly from

 PBS.org's "'Comparing Preschool Philosophies": 

Play-Based Schools: 

"In a play-based program, children choose activities based on their current interests. The term “play-based” is often interchanged with “child-centered,” which could be used to describe the majority of available preschool programs. The play-based classroom is broken up into sections, such as a home or kitchen, science area, water table, reading nook, space with blocks and other toys, or other areas. Teachers encourage the kids to play, facilitating social skills along the way. “Even though it seems like they are just playing, they are learning valuable skills, including important social skills and cooperation with others, learning about signs (as most items are labeled), and early math,” says Jenifer Wana, author of “How to Choose the Best Preschool for Your Child.”

e.g.: Reggio Emilia schools 

Academic-Based Schools: 

"Alternatively, there are academic programs, considered didactic, “teacher-directed,” “teacher-managed.” In these classrooms, teachers lead the children in a more structured way, planning the activities, then guiding the children in doing them. This design is aimed at preparing kids for the kindergarten setting. For the most part, classroom time is devoted to learning letters and sounds, distinguishing shapes and colors, telling time, and other skills."

e.g.: Montessori school, Waldorf school, etc. 

It's probably true that the "average" preschool is a mix of the two, 

but disagreeing with PBS, 
I feel like in general the "average" preschool 

gravitates much further towards academic than play-based. 

At least that's my observation from touring options 

both for Aaron and then years later for Oliver. 

PBS and I will agree to disagree on this. 

***

Let me pause here and state clearly: 

I believe the vast majority of children can thrive in either setting. 

Children are highly adaptable creatures, 

much much much than we give them credit. 

Yes, some children may find one environment very chaotic, 

versus finding the other very rigid. 

But I hear the parents say 

"my child loves their school!" 

that's simply what the child is used to. 

Unless the child is actually splitting time between preschools,

 there's not much comparison. 

In a very rare example, 

my friend sent her kids 3 days to a "regular" preschool and 2 days to Montessori. 

Her children preferred the "regular" preschool 

because they felt they had more freedom to play, 

but she explained if she had sent them to ONLY Montessori, 

she is absolutely convinced they would have loved it there too. 

In summary, as long as the environment is safe and nurturing, 

a child can thrive in either play-based or academic-based preschools. 

***

Now, back to my predicament with Oliver. 

In the 15 minute radius of our home, 

we have two academic-based preschools 

and one play-based preschool. 

Both academic-based preschools have a very similar curriculum, 

and fairly similar structure. 

Essentially, it's your "average/normal" preschool. 
It has play time, but it also has an established curriculum 
(maybe less so with younger kids, but definitely with older). 

The play-based one, though, has me totally captivated. 

It is a nature-immersion school located at a nature-center 

with over 300+ acres of woods, rivers, ponds, etc. 

The kids are outside the whole time,

 regardless of rain or snow. 

(Think: full-body snowsuits as the daily "winter uniform")

The kids spend their 3 hours together as a class, 

exploring, getting messy, and soaking up nature. 

The kids dictate the subjects of lessons. 
During my visit, the week's theme was "worms." 

The next week was going to be "sticks." 

To me, this is heaven. 

To Oliver, this is heaven. 

Problem? 

The writing curriculum. 

As in, there is no curriculum. 

The teachers incorporate the alphabet and letters 

into the current week. 

"Worm starts with 'w'.  Look these sticks make a 'w.'" 

But it's not the sit-down workbook-style of most preschools. 
She did explain that most children begin to show interest in writing later on, 
as once they do, the teachers start to incorporate a little more. 
But again, totally child-based. 

Now, this next part I'm going to say is highly controversial. 

Ready?

If Oliver doesn't know how to write his alphabet by kindergarten... 

SO WHAT? 

Like, isn't that the purpose of kindergarten? 

And here's where the research studies get interesting. 

The NY Times released an article in May (here) 

citing that children who attended a more rigorous, academic preschool, 

outperformed their peers by the end of kindergarten. 

However, there is no study yet that follows children past kindergarten. 

On the contrary, the New York times also published an article (here) 

describing how play is in fact more important than academic study. 

Play is learning! 

And then the nature part is a whole different part. 
Nature has been proven time and again to be incredibly important, 
which is why parents and schools are encouraged to get kids outside as often as possible. 
One of the academic-preschools doesn't go outside AT ALL. 
This was appalling to me. 
I'm not linking a particular study here but a google search will yield you dozens.  

But back to specific academic vs play-based. 
Clearly, there is evidence in both directions. 

And so, my conundrum comes down to this: 

Oliver would LOVE an outdoor, play-based preschool. 

He would thrive and it would be great. 

The problem is, am I (including Adam) ok with Oliver 

not being 100% top-notch "prepared" for kindergarten? 

My gut here is: 

"He's going to spend his whole childhood in school. 

Why not let him play now?" 

Oliver and Aaron in the rain. They love it so much. 


Your thoughts?